What I’m afraid of..

I’m not sure of many of you feel the same, but you know what I’m really always afraid of. I’m afraid of getting too close with anyone! Yes, because every time I seem to do that, they seem to leave. I’m always afraid about the time they would leave. Even though I’m pretty young, I’ve met and known lots of people; I don’t know half of them now. But why? Why do they always give up? Why do they leave you standing alone, hurt and broken? You try your best not to lose them, but that’s what happens eventually. They walk away. And forget everything. So easily. Yes, you move on eventually, but you still can’t forget them, somehow. But at the same time, you gotta set them free! You have a battle between what you know, and how you feel. Basically your mind and heart; that’s the worst war humanity ever had.

Day by day you start to care less, and forget! And then you find good things happening, but in a moment it collapses and you don’t know where you stand. Whether you should actually care for anyone from the beginning. Because seriously, all they do is. Leave. Man it would feel good when someone finally comes in your life and says “I’m not gonna leave”. But where is that person..They never come! And how would you know they wouldn’t leave you, again? One day you just give up, you don’t care anymore. But after a while you feel bad inside, like something is missing. And then it goes all over again! What most people don’t get is, you get hurt because you will not leave them, but they do. I get that everyone has a role in your life, but why do you have to suffer twice? From the same thing? You say; “It’s gonna be different this time”. And it never does. It’s an endless cycle.

And back to the point again of being afraid of people leaving; you become afraid from people themselves, because you don’t wanna hurt them, nor hurt yourself. So you stay away! But that doesn’t solve anything..Because┬áIn the end, they all leave you! In the end, you still get hurt. In the end, there are tears and cry, and all they do is lie. ┬áIn the end, you don’t know who’ll leave and who’ll leave. So you become afraid of people! And afraid on your heart, because it screams and you’re the only one who can hear it. Why do people leave? Why? No matter how many times you say you’re sorry, no matter what the reason was, they still leave. Move on. “But what about me?” That’s what you scream inside! Why do people give up on each other easily?

And this is what you end up with! (Note: I drew this.)

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